As my sister decided that she still wants to be a working girl (not that kind!) and needed some new blazers, skirts and pants for job interviews, I agreed to go shopping with her somehow forgetting we both abhor the act.
We plundered through several stores with little result but were at least rewarded with a good laugh. In one fine establishment crawling with seasoned shoppers, my sister stood by nearly defeated as I took charge throwing various garments over my arm for her perusal.
After I was sufficiently loaded down, a shop girl (I hope this is an offensive term?) approached and asked me "Would you like me to start a dressing room for you?" Should I take it as a compliment that someone possibly thought at 6 feet tall and still with my winter weight on that I could fit into a women's size 4? We rode a wave of laughter into another store and finally found what she was looking for.
This weekend's plans include less daring pursuits. I think I'll watch the rain feed the garden and my cats catch up on their sleep. Did I forget to mention that I adopted a cat friend for Rizzo? Oops. His name is Nigel and they're getting along famously. Thank you for the excellent cat wrangling advice Coaster Punchman!
I'm fully aware that one more cat in the mix thrusts me into crazy cat lady territory but just think how stylish I'll be as they cart me away in that new pantsuit!
27 comments:
I find her phrase start a dressing room for you to be a bit odd. Mind you, I haven't shopped for clothes in, well, forever, but I didn't know a dressing room needed to be "started".
Did she have a hammer and saw in her hands? Do they build each dressing room from scratch? You guys sure are spoiled in TO.
For the record, Nigel is one of my favourite cat names of all time.
Glad you had a nice visit with your sister. Very thoughtful and brotherly of you to accompany her on the shopping trip.
Did Ms. Burnett sing, dance, tell jokes, answer questions from the audience? All of the above?
Have you considered a dog? I'm much more of a dog person than a cat person, although I've never owned either.
It was odd and made odder perhaps by the peals of laughter I answered her with Skyler's Dad.
Very spoiled Barbara, you should see how they react when you ask them to make change. Nigel came with the name and I felt the only right thing to do was keep it, and him.
It was an evening of Reflection and Laughter Esther. It was a few film clips, some memories shared by Carol and a lot of Q & A. It was quite lovely. I love dogs too Esther and used to have one. Rizzo was a feral cat rescued from my back garden so I had no choice, she forced me to take her in and then Nigel seemed like the right thing to do. Will you go shopping for me if I ask nicely?
"Would you like me to start a dressing room for you?"
Is that like putting the kettle on to boil? How very nice that they have someone prepare a dressing room just for you, like a valet.
I'm right jealous over you getting to go see Carol Burnett and me, not.
And had I known you were in the habit of adopting cats, I'd have already sent my two...
How did you come up with the name Nigel? Who's he named after? I don't know why I need to know this but I do.
Oh and I hate your sister. Size 4 bah!
I was going to start chastising you for not telling the world about Nigel, but I'm too lazy.
Dude, your handsome sister is a size 4? Not after that banana split she scarfed down. Oh, wait that was me. If I'd known she was that size I would have given her some of the stuff that is now too big for me (I'm a size 3! Must go find new clothes! Take me shopping!)
And what Bubs said. Exactly.
I think officially you have to have five cats to REALLY be a cat lady. And a vagina.
But I do hear if you frequent high class clothing stores and have two cats, you might turn into Quentin Crisp. I believe you need a cravat.
"Recently my younger sister came to town to celebrate the outsourcing of her job after 18 years"
The Nun???
Kidding.
"Would you like me to start a dressing room for you?"
Er, methinks she was offering up herself, 'cause that really sounds like a bad porno line.
Sounds like you had a great night. Not only did you spend time with your family, but you got to see an iconic figure in the flesh. On top of that, you now have free blowjobs for life.
Most guys would call that the promised land.
You know who's stylish? Nigel. Check out the Liz Taylor/Cleopatra eyeliner--it's really obvious in the profile pic you posted here. This is a cat with daring and panache--props to both of you.
Nigel is a fine looking feline specimen my friend. Of course should you be compelled to start 'outfitting' the kitties you may in fact qualify as a crazy cat lady.
Glad you were able to take in Ms. Burnett's show at Massey Hall too. Did you manage to ask her a question during the Q & A portion? That must have been one heck of a diverse audience. (Bet you saw a few snappy pantsuits too.)
s
Nigel is a fabulous name. And what great posture.
You have no idea how disappointed I am that you didn't name the new cat Kenickie.
You know I read this and my one thought was "What a nice brother that Dale is."
I guess we'll have to see about the cat owner side.
And then they validate you and your parking Bubs, it's quite a service!
Had I known Les, I would have brought you along! It was good clean fun. I am all out of love for cats right now though. Nigel's made me more allergic than ever.
He came with the name Blanche so that mystery's solved! I thought it was pretty funny so I kept it. My mother said something like 'what? is he British?'. She's a tiny little thing that sister.
I figured you were at least as lazy as me Coaster Punchman so I took my sweet time. Thanks again for all your tips and tricks.
You're on your own for shopping Tanya. As little as I actually did, I consider it my good deed for the next year.
Should the cravat be paisley Vegetable Assassin or should I go solid? What's in in the cravat world?
Yes Cormac, the nun! They've been outsourced to India, the praying is a whole different thing now. Okay, it wasn't the nun, it was one of my many other sisters. Come to think of it, the music in the store was kind of bow chicky bow bow.
It took me a minute to figure out you'd clicked over to Tanya's for a full service comment X. Dell. It was quite a night.
He's something else Holly and once he settles on a publicist, the world will be his.
I didn't ask any questions Sean as there was quite a queue throughout the hall for the privilege. There were scooters, canes, blind people, kids and all manner of strange types, myself included.
When he's not collapsing on the floor demanding to be petted Allison, his posture's excellent.
I couldn't do it Beckeye, he's sluttier than Rizzo ever was! Maybe if he'd come with his own car and leather jacket I might have.
I guess I'm nice once in a while Chancelucky but try not to let that get out. I don't really own the cats though, they own me!
In britain, the word pants means underpants. I've trained myself never to say it after embarrassing episodes and now you NAmericans just say it with abandon, making me chortle each time.
Awwww..Nigel looks like my Stanley.
I absolutely believe you should be flattered by shop girl and her efforts to serve you. Serve..not service.
I am so jealous that you saw Carol!!
We are headed to see Tony Bennett once again..late September.
I'm so jealous! I love Carol!
Love Carol.
Love the name Nigel.
Would love to be a size 4.
Love Carol!! Did she do the Tarzan yell?? (yep, that's me the redneck, wanting to hear her do the ultimate yell of all time).
Ok, pants are underpants in Britain, so, what are they actually, trousers??
My German cousin (who teaches English)and she was taught the "Queen's English", told me-
"humm-- now I have to find a rubber -- I know it's around here somewhere". I thought, "WHAT???"
I told her-- that a rubber was NOT an ERASER by American standards! I told her what it actually meant in American slang and she was DUMFOUNDED!! "Oh, she said, I will have to inform my students of that!".
Yes, honey, you have an obligation to do that!
Love your blog Tina
You've got a ways to go before you come close to crazy cat hoarding lady status. A friend of mine has 7 of her own and is fostering(?) 2 more. Last week I met a gal who lives in a 1 bedroom apartment with 7 cats, and another who has 7 indoor cats and 10 outdoor cats.
Sounds like fun!
Hope you have a great 4th of July weekend too!
cheers! H
That would have been a hilarious sight seeing you trying those pants!
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