6/02/2008

The End of the Line

Friday marked the end of yet another era in my life - I endured a long goodbye from the Elvis train conductor's who'd been reigning over my (in)sanity.

The company that runs the commuter trains we good, bad and indifferent citizens use has changed hands and so there's been a change in staff starting today. Don't worry about poor Elvis lite though, he'll still be employed, just on another line. He chitted and chatted quite a bit over the 40 minute ride home on Friday but knowing it was his last ride, I was barely agitated.

One of the things I won't miss is the way he had of calling out the stops. One of them, Old Cummer (not named after me), he'd drag out interminably so it was more like Ooooooooooooooooooooooold Cummer", funny once but never again. As we pulled in to the last stop, he got back on the horn and said Elvis has left the building, thank ya thank ya very much.

There were no tears to be wiped from my eye although had there been, they would have been made of hope and joy.

I'm giving the new guy two days before I can find some horror, real or imagined, to complain about.

26 comments:

VE said...

Two days huh? That's mighty old school of you. Most people today would do it in two minutes.

pistols at dawn said...

I'd just start the new relationship off right by punching the new guy straight off.

Writeprocrastinator said...

You just know Dale that with your track record, that he will turn up outside your doorstep crooning "Are You Lonesome Tonight?"

At any rate, your place or Honeypot's and that's just good blogging schadenfreude.

chelene said...

What's after Old Cummer? Wet Spot Junction?

Tanya Espanya said...

Honestly, I hate that Cummer name...

Bubs said...

Maybe instead of Elvis you'll get a would-be Rodney Dangerfield and he'll punctuate every announcement with "WHOA, YOU'RE A GOOD CROWD"

SkylersDad said...

Perhaps the new guy will simply be a deranged mumbler who nobody can understand!

You can dream, can't you?

Jewgirl said...

I have missed you POTD.

"Old Cummmer" That is so fucking hysterical, I can't stand it. Another goody would've been "Droopy Lips" and "Creepy Stainer".

You must find something new to kvetch about soon. I love your laments. By the by, how is bagelbitch?

xo

Chris said...

Change is good! It gives you new and unique things to gripe about.

BeckEye said...

Does anyone actually get off on Old Cummer?

Falwless said...

Some people don't discriminate on age, BeckEye.

I mean, I do, but some other people don't, I'm sure.

Chancelucky said...

How do you know it'll be a guy?

Could be Korean Bagel Lady

Allison said...

So, what's there to complain about with the new guy?

Tanya Espanya said...

Honk! Snort! What Chelene said! ohmygod, dying!

And then Beckeye, Aahahahahhahhahah! Stop it, ladies, I'm scaring the baby by laughing so much!

Grant Miller said...

I always feel weird when people you've imagined bonding with in some sense move on.

Gifted Typist said...

Not a wet eye in the house, eh Dale?

I swear I was on that guys train last summer when visiting with Espanya. I wondered if it was just me and then I read something about this here. Thank god, you saved me from all that self-doubt

Barbara Bruederlin said...

As we pulled in to the last stop, he got back on the horn and said Elvis has left the building, thank ya thank ya very much.

With horror, Dale then saw him fall into the arms of the waiting Korean Bagel Lady. We watched helplessly as they left the station arm in arm, already plotting Dale's slow painful death.

You left that part out.

Coaster Punchman said...

I am both sad and relieved for you.

Dale said...

I was right VE, 2 days in and although I'm happier, I'm already picking away at their message delivery.

There are two of them now so in order to win Pistols, I have to isolate them and punch them individually.

I waited in fear (and continue to) that the doorbell would ring and just that would happen WP.

Although there is no prize and no contest, Chelene, you have made me laugh so ahem, hard with your comment that you win! There's a street named Cummer and then they expanded it (perhaps for drainage) and now there's an Old Cummer. I pray it wasn't someone's name.

I know Tanya, and will I ever stop snickering when they announce it or calling out "Here!" as though it's roll call?

It'd be a nice change to have a little Rodney style over the airwaves (at least once). Maybe a new celebrity every day?

If only Skyler's Dad! Whatever happened to the unintelligble noise from the p.a.? This is crystal clear and loud!

I love Creepy Stainer Katie, haha. The Bagel Lady seems fine (although poorer for lack of my business) and got a haircut. Should I go ask her about it?

Looking forward to just that Chris, it's always something!

You know they do Beckeye, especially a bad Elvis impersonator who tries to prolong the pleasure.

There's room for everyone on the crazy train Falwless, be they old cummers or young ones.

Thankfully your prediction has not come to pass Chancelucky. At least the new guys seem young and professional and not a bagel in sight.

So far Allison, not much and of course that saddens me. They do now make announcements saying "This is Brad, your Customer Service Ambassador speaking to you from Car 5". I hope they're not all named Brad.

This is what I love about the blogging Tanya. The comments never fail to make me snort, snicker, howl and sometimes moan.

You're not talking about us are you Grant Miller? Don't dream it's over.

If I can save one person's sanity while refusing to have mine called into question Gifted Typist, that's one more plus for our health care system. Or maybe two.

It was all too horrifying Barbara, I couldn't finish but now at least when I mysteriously disappear, people will know the truth. Thank you.

Thank you for returning the emotion to this blog CP, I appreciate it.

Blowing Shit Up With Gas said...

I won't dare type it, but do you suppose oldcummer.com is taken?

X. Dell said...

If he's really that much of a ham, he belongs in politics like the rest of them. Sending him to another line is simply going to infuriate a new generation of passengers.

Leonesse said...

Wait, so when will you be the proverbial 'old cummer' and move on? I mean... never mind... I am sure they don't call you something similar...

Mob said...

I hope the next conductor does some celeb you'll find more to your liking, or that they at least take requests.

Danny Tagalog said...

He can come to Japan - we need character, even annoying one's like him. We get military style 'DOORS CLOSING' and 'DOORS OPENING', and that's it. Even an Old Cummer anecdote would be preferable!

Hahn at Home said...

All these broken relationships - first KBL and now him. I don't know how you can go on.

Dale said...

I'm scared to type it in too BSUWG in case my photo pops up.

He really should be stopped X. Dell because ham barely begins to describe it. I feel for the people who are next affected.

I'm sure it's only behind my back Leonesse.

Requests for the sounds of silence would be right up there on my list Mob. The new guys are more no nonsense but make a lot of announcements. "The train is leaving in 2 minutes". "The train is leaving in 1 minute". "The train is leaving in 1/2 a minute".

I'll see how much shipping is and try to get him over to you as soon as possible Danny. By the way, hi again!

It's been tough H at H but I'm a brave little soldier.