5/12/2008

Walk This Way

Today I found myself wrapped up in an accidental enterprise. I was minding my own (and everyone else's) business walking the block or so back from the bank to my office. Crossing the street, I spied a decent sized group of middle aged tourist types. My recourse seemed simple - I'd swath right through the centre of them and continue on my way.

As I started through, they somehow closed in around me and boom - I'm on a guided walking tour led by someone clucking in umlauts and hurdy gurdy wordiness. Dutch I figured.

It took a bit of jostling but I freed myself as quickly as possible and carried on my way. For a moment, and my trouble, I considered letting them in on this great place I know for coffee but my chewy Canadian centre wouldn't allow it - we need the tourist dollars.

You're welcome Canada! My country 'tis of thee. Wait, wrong country. Never mind.

26 comments:

FranIAm said...

Oh you!

It's the bleachy good flav-ah of KBL Coffee!

Valerie said...

You should've pulled a Joey Tribiani and asked them if they were from Neverland.

SkylersDad said...

Sounds like a group of Swedish Chefs from the Muppets!

Chris said...

I saw a Dutch guy on TV once. He looked pretty normal, kinda.

Blowing Shit Up With Gas said...

Kind of like being abducted by aliens. There wasn't any weird time delay, was there? (Like, when you got out of the Dutch circle, it was a week later?) Just checking...

Coaster Punchman said...

Was it Rosanne Rosannadanna who was always minding her own business?

X. Dell said...

Lemme get this straight: you were going to take them by Gin's place so that they could get her special blend of coffee and bleach? Sounds like an international incident to me.

Years from now, a toddler will ask his granfather, "What did you do during the Dutch-Canadian War?" and "How did it start?"

Suze's Sass said...

Wow - they should hire you as vice president. Does Canada even have a vice president? If not, our old one will be available in a few months. Free of charge 'cause we're neighborly like that. You're welcome.

BeckEye said...

You should've put them to work assembling all of your IKEA furniture.

Chancelucky said...

How do you know they weren't Korean?

Dale said...

You know you want some Fran!

They looked confused enough Valerie.

Skyler's Dad - I thought of the muppets when I was listening to them talk.

It's always the normal looking ones Chris, beware.

The only time lost was during my struggle to escape Patrick, as far as I know.

Emily Litella made it into my labels CP, but Rosanne was just as gentle.

It's my sad bid to be part of history X. Dell, I'll think of doing almost anything. At least I stopped a war. That counts right?

As always Suze, you're too good to me/us. Keep your Veep, our Prime Minister is botching things up nicely by himself.

Only if they promised me a discount on the furniture and told me how to pronounce the brand names Beckeye.

The eyes have it, Chancelucky.

Cap'n Ergo Jinglebollocks said...

Didn't you ever read the writings of Zen Master Hoogee? The one who said, "be like water...flow"

I think he meant something like, "go AROUND big passles of slow moving humans, dummy!"

Then again, what do I know? The only crowds we got HERE in the middle of fucking nowhere Western NY is cows...

Dale said...

I always think I'm smarter than the herd and then find myself in a running of the cows Cap'n Ergo.

Writeprocrastinator said...

Way to avoid an international incident, Dale The Diplomat.

pistols at dawn said...

That's not the patented friendliness I've come to expect in my Canucks.

Bubs said...

In addition to being witty and cool who knew you were also so civic-minded?

Dale said...

I work around the clock trying to save the world WP, usually from me.

We're snarky when riled Pistols, beware.

I give and give and what do I get? More aggravation Bubs.

Writeprocrastinator said...

"I work around the clock trying to save the world WP, usually from me."

And don't forget about the tainted coffee and bagels, especially the coffee. On the other hand, the folks that make CLR must really not like you, you're cutting into their business like crazy.

Jill said...

Cannot defend yourself from old people?

Distributorcap said...

i am always late

Gifted Typist said...

kidnapped by umlauts! Dale, I never know what will befall you next

Dale said...

I could actually be increasing sales Write Procrastinator. Their new slogan might be "CLR changed my life!"

I'm about to Jill, they're everywhere and I feel I must do battle.

Meet you in the middle Distributor Cap, I'm always too early.

I never know either Gifted Typists, my goal is to become a shut in and pretend the things on television are real.

Jill said...

better can yourself in shape, then! And no, Wii doesn't count!

Dale said...

It does if you're talking about Wii Fitness Jill.

Jill said...

I don't think it does a good strengh workout! It maybe works for the cardio, but you want to defend yourself from them, you need muscles!

Dale said...

You could always pick it up and throw it at them Jill, the Wii Fitness thing.