Number 5 Revolution

I've read a lot of good Q & A sessions in the blogger interviews going around and decided that since I enjoy being fashionably late on occasion, it was time for someone to ask me a few questions. I asked Coaster Punchman (CP), already in the zone from several good interviews himself and he came up with these gems.

1. Who do you like better, me or Mindy? Compare/contrast.

This was a tough, soul searching question. Since meeting you on the blogs CP, I've been very impressed with your stalking, thieving, and writing abilities. I was lucky enough to meet you in a public place with backup and learned first hand that not only are you smart, funny and stylish up close, you even have a poor George who comes with his own inestimable qualifications.

Your good friend Mindy, I grew to know by association, first on the blogs where she intimidated me a little with her big brain and then later, in a public place with back up. During the planning phases for my trip to London, Mindy provided a lot of great insider information about what to see, where to go and so on by email. She was a real sweetheart. When I met her, she was immediately charming, witty and sexy, a woman with a devilish side who put me at ease straight away.

Having mulled this question over for practically many minutes, I'm going to have to go with your mutual friend Lulu. As far as I know, she's only judged me secretly to this point.

2. Tell us about the last time you bitch slapped someone, in word or in deed. Describe in great detail how much they deserved it, and what exactly you did that might satisfy my hunger for a good revenge story.

I'm generally an easy going, kind, compassionate and willing to listen sort of guy despite my often crusty demeanor which I save for the blog. I don't however, have a problem demanding good service when there's no reason for it not to be good or I'm paying through the nose for it. Although it's a while gone now, this post described a minor sparring match that, I feel, I stuck the landing on. Generally, I gently bitch slap people at work all the time but that doesn't count because they're often unarmed. Oh, and don't talk, eat or breathe at the movies if I'm in the theatre unless you're a lot bigger than me. If I can take you, I'll tell you to shut the fuck up.

3. What exactly do you perceive to be the problem with the French Canadians? Should they be allowed to live? Why or why not?

I don't believe French Canadians have a problem, it's all French people and that problem is, they don't speak English. The town I grew up in was about half French and half English. The English were morally above reproach and clearly the chosen people. The French sneered and hissed at us like animals, spoke a type of backward gibberish and fought with us just because we were better than them and called them frogs. That is, until the native Indians on a nearby reservation burned down their Church, their school, a couple of roadside bars and started getting bussed into our schools. Then we made up and out with the French like nobody's business. Did you know they do wine and have tasty sauces for practically anything? I love the French and have decided to let them live. Unless they rebuild the school for the Indians and then they're out.

4. You seem to be the most loyal blogger in terms of responding to your comments. Describe just how bad it feels when the rest of us fail to respond to yours.

When I first started getting comments on posts, I wondered if I should just play the aloof card and not respond or if I should respond and let everyone know just how aloof I really was. It seems to be all or nothing with me. As I cry myself to sleep at night anyway, whether people respond to my comments or not has little to no impact.

5. Is Toronto it for you? Have you ever considered moving? Where would you relocate to if you could?

Toronto's been a great city to live and work in and I like that it's relatively safe and clean. I'm not very nomadic by nature and think I would have a hard time just pulling up stakes and moving around. When I visit other places and see their relative charms, I do ask myself if I could live there or not though.

Somewhere on the west coast of Canada like Victoria British Columbia would be lovely; it's filled with charm, is on the water and I hear the mushrooms are pretty good.

If I didn't have to work, I'd love to split my time between somewhere quiet like Victoria, somewhere more energetic like London or New York and perhaps I'd throw Rome in there for a few months out of the year. It can't be that hard to make a living selling water off a cart for a Euro or two to the tourists can it? I mean I've bought it.

If any of you would like to be asked five whole questions, ask Coaster Punchman. Or I guess you could ask me.
I'll email you questions as long as your email is in your profile or comment and you'll answer them and like it.


Barbara Bruederlin said...

Now you have to answer my comment with something pithy, wise, clever and earth-shattering.

lulu said...

awwwwwwww I'm flattered Dale, thanks!

Chris said...

Great interview, you two!

Tanya Espanya said...

Honk! Very excellent!

Even though I've already been grilled by Gizmorox, maybe you'd like to ask me who I like better, Mindy or CP? (My answer would probably be Old Timey Uncle Fafo.)

Flannery Alden said...

I'd love it if you'd interview me, Dale.

Valerie said...

One of my pet peeves is people who talk at the movie theater too. And don't get me started on people who talk on their cell phones at the movies. They deserve to hang by their toes from the ceiling (but not the ceiling of the theater I am sitting in, because that would be too noisy.)

Fearless said...

With all these surveys going around it seems like blogs are becoming the new myspace.

Coaster Punchman said...

Them are fightin' words, Fearless.

Nice way to wuss yourself out of the Tom or Mindy question. Sorry (Lu) for the unoriginality, but I figured it would be a good theme throughout my interviews.

Grant Miller said...

CP seems like a tough question asker. But I thought real French hate French-Canadians?

Dale said...

Of course I will Barbara but it won't come until several comments or even posts from now.

You're welcome Lulu. Your CP put me in a tight spot.

Chris, I did what I could. It's tough not to be a smartass when you keep getting set up like that!

Tanya, your answer should be going through your lawyer. Remember what the judge said.

I will compose thoughtful questions just for you Flannery Alden my sweet.

Excellent thinking Valerie. We must go to the movies sometime and deal with the infidels as we see fit.

Don't worry Fearless, nobody's reading them.

Careful CP, he's Fearless. And of course you know I like you better. Unless Mindy's reading and then it's her. And you Lulu? Well, it goes without saying.

I think the real French do look down a bit on the Frenadians Grant but it really may just be my love of saying 'It's always the French' that spurred CP's line of questioning. I'm about a 10 joke pony, nothing ever too new too fast.

gifted typist said...

I think you are the most faithful responder to blogger comments I've ever seen. I think you deserve and Order of Canada for that. (And you'd better effin' respond to this!)

Tanya Espanya's Lawyer said...

Mr. Dale, even we don't want her as a client anymore.

Mel said...

I am here via Tanya's blog. I was gonna lurk but then I decided that would be rude. So hey up there from the deep south!

Bubs said...

I'm afraid to even comment because I'm not clever enough. Good interview though!

BeckEye said...

I thought we already discussed this, and you were supposed to interview me already. Stop wasting time or I will bitch-slap you.

Dale said...

No comment, gifted typist.

We, Tanya Espanya's Lawyer? What are you, two headed?

Hello Mel, you must be in Deep if you're lurking. It is encouraged however if you so please.

Never let em see you sweat Bubs and stop wearing that deodorant, you smell like a girl.

Email me Beckeye before I let you slap me around a little. It's on my profile.

Fearless said...

CP - Me fighting with someone who watches American Idol would be the equivalent of Godzilla fighting a blind eight year old with no arms.

The Freelance Cynic said...

A wonderful interview. I love it when your arrogance shines through!

X. Dell said...

I assume you were joking about the Indians burning down he churches.

Tenacious S said...

I would happily hop back and forth between London and Chicago. Clearly weather is not the number one criteria for me.

"jew" "girl" said...

you and cp are too much. too, too, too much!

you feel laid back, but I had no idea just how laid back you are. I envy that. you'll live a long heart happy life. :)

ps: your word verification today begins with vd. hmm... I wonder, hidden message, perhaps?

Dale said...

Has the blind 8 year old been working out in any way Fearless?

I am better than everyone Freelance. It's not arrogance if it's true is it?

They burned a lot of things X. Dell, I'm pretty sure my memory is correct but I'll try and corroborate with my sis who has a larger brain.

If the vibe is right, the weather definitely isn't the driving force Tenacious S. I can see clearly now.

Au contraire Katie, I believe I'm just the right amount. CP? I dunno. I may seem laid back but I'm as big a wreck as anyone out there. VD = very Daleish

Jill said...

I did not read the whole post, but a question got my attention!!!
The first part of your answer, I could have kick your ass!!!
But the end of it make it all better... and you are kind of excuse!!

Dale said...

I wonder which question Jill? :-) I knew you'd kick my ass if I was too mean.

Writeprocrastinator said...

That was very interesting and while Coaster served up great questions, I feel there is a little bit of Dale being held back.

I'll have to talk to the cook down at Hahn's Hibachi that served in the North Korean Secret Service, about how best to extract that information.

Coaster Punchman said...

All right Fearless, this means war! When you dis American Idol, you are letting the terrorists win! Why do you have America??

Dale said...

There's always a little held back Chancelucky. Your idea has merit though.

I'll step in here and hope that Coaster Punchman meant why do you hate America. Corners please.

Fearless said...

I have America because it was given to me for free when I purchased England.

Coaster Punchman said...

Shit, I do need to learn to proofread. Or maybe it's time to get bifocals. Good comeback though. I'll let you off the hook based on that alone.

Dale said...

Who can resist a buy one, get one free huh Fearless?

The world is safe from the wrath of CP and all is good again.