9/18/2006

Primetime Almost Live

Some of you may recall my wonderfully received return to filmed entertainment. I have another announcement on a par with that level of excitement. I’ve now come home to prime time television!

Over the past few years, I’ve simply waited until the newest television offerings have been declared genius and ended up on DVD. From there, I’m free to further ignore these programs in yet another format. With all my time freed up, I have extra hours to re-imagine my iPod playlists.

Last night, the season finale of Canadian Idol was on. Host Ben Mulroney yelled Canada Rocks! at me for about an hour and a half while the kids sang and sang and sang and sang. Many of them sang at least as well as me and one even ended up winning which I thought was nice. The winner automatically gets showered with confetti, actually everyone does, and the promise of regional stardom which sometimes does happen.

The tenth edition of The Amazing Race came on next. I’d never seen this show but hear all the time that it’s the only reality show people of distinction will admit to watching. My money’s on the hillbilly hopefuls. I hope they win, get their teeth fixed and then break up over a squabble about what ride to go on next at Dollywood.

Then without warning, terror returned to television in a way nobody could have anticipated. Judd Hirsch’s large head filled my big screen and stayed there for minutes. After I stopped screaming, I realized it was a show called Studio 60 something something too long a title for me.

So how is it that Matthew Perry can manage to look puffier and older than the 150 year old virgin Judd? Oh that’s right, Matthew keeps accidentally eating painkillers or something doesn’t he? Not a bad show overall although I did miss the middle 20 minutes while mentally reorganizing my sock drawer.

The news came on after that and I didn’t understand the plot, the pacing or why exactly they lead with fear every damned night. I went to bed and I still woke up this morning.

23 comments:

mellowlee said...

I watched part of the Canadian Idol finale, but as I hadn't watched any of this season, and Ben was really getting on my nerves I tuned out. Did that Eva girl win? I never watch The Amazing Race, but it seems a little like that movie "cannonball run".?

Coaster Punchman said...

Now just hold on a minute. Michael Moore already promised us that the Canadian news doesn't lead in with fear. In fact, he also promised us that Canadians (at least those who live in Windsor) don't lock their doors, either. I want these things to be true, so don't burst my bubble.

That, and I dream of a trip to Dollywood. Who's with me?

Holly said...

The thing I like best about this post, Dale, is that you're not actually recommending anything, so I don't have to feel obligated to see if you're right in telling me that some show or another is really pretty good.

Which leaves me lots of time to explain to people why I don't yet own an ipod, an activity that takes more and more of my time.

Berry said...

I accidentally landed on Cdn Idol last night during the clip about all the stars and experts that held clinics with the kids this year. I have to admit I was surprised at some of the heavies that were there! (Tony B.!).... but then Nelly Fur-what's-her-name started performing in heels way too high for her, and I had to tune out.

So hey, I'll go out on a limb and recommend a couple of shows from my personal list of favs: Two and a Half Men (goddamn that's funny), and Boston Legal (goddamn that's funny too... and clever). Watch 'em, and then let's discuss, k? K.

Old Lady said...

Two & a Half Men is a must see Dale. After that my devious mind goes to all the CSI's and Criminal Minds.

Yasamin said...

Dale~! This just goes to show how much i know about Canadian tv... you have an (insert your country here) Idol? trip out. I cant even handle the US version.

I am totally interested in watchin that new Studio 60 show but everything else just sucks. except My Name Is Earl. that makes me giggle like a school girl. that and 2 1/2 men. hehe @ Sober Charlie Sheen.

I cant handle reality shows. they scare the hell out of me. Cant do it. Nope. sorry.

ps. i cant stop yawning. :(

Anonymous said...

I already know who's gonna win The Amazing Race.

The two hot guys!! Good show, I like it!

Bluez (beta won't let me comment :-(

jin said...

TV bores the hell out of me unless it's BBC.

I'd much rather sit in front of the pc & read intelligent blogs. (Y'know, like yours & CP's! ;-)
Teeheeeee!

LMAO! Word veri: jofkewe
I don't know a joe, though...

DAMN...would you believe I got that word veri WRONG!!!!
Let's try again.....

Dale said...

Eva did win although I was hoping the other fella from Newfoundland would take it. Eva struck me a little phoney in that Celine Dion way. Cannonball Run? That's funny Lee. I'd never seen it before and it seemed cool. Their first trek involved going from Seattle to China which was cool to see.

I'd go to Dollywood if you're getting a bus tour together CP. Some people don't lock their doors (although I do) and we only lead with fear if it's a slow weather day.

After we hook you up with the high speed, I'm taking you iPod shopping Holly. Just so you won't have to keep explaining. You don't have to use it or anything.

I've seen bits of Boston Legal and it does seem pretty good Berry. As for the Idol, yes, Martina McBride, Tony Bennett, Nelly Furtado, Chantal Kreviazuk, Cyndi Lauper all stopped by to lend a helping hand. The winner will be opening for Martina on her tour.

I'm sure it qualifies me for alien status Old Lady but I've never seen any of the Law & Order or CSI series.

No yawning while on my blog please Yasamin. That Studio 60 show seemed pretty decent although I can't recommend anything else. I'm a half assed TV watcher. Nugget - ______ Idol didn't even start in America you know! They have them all over the world.

Hey Bluez - you mean the former junkie Zoolander model guys? They might. But it seems unpredicatable. If I remember to watch, it might be fun!

The Beeb rocks Jin. Some of the best stuff comes from across the pond.

I'm pretty sure those word verifications are designed purposefully by some twitching laughing guy alone in a room with just his letters. Wait a minute, that describes me.

Erik said...

I was overly proud of myself for surviving two years without TV (I was too cheap to pay the license) but when I returned to the US, I found the quality of television had miraculously improved. Now I can go for four hours every night watching a different "Law & Order" if I like (and sometimes, oh, I do like).

Oh, and there's one other reality show people of distinction will admit to following, at least down here: "Project Runway." For someone who buys all his clothes at Old Navy & has the general fashion sense of Kurt Vonnegut (i.e. all my clothes sport tiny cigarette burns), I do love some Runway.

Old Lady said...

'Splain paying for license for TV

Chancelucky said...

Never seen Canadian Idol. Who do you get for judges? Next I'll find out that Canadian's have their own bacon.

X. Dell said...

Wow, more shows like that and you could mentally clean your house in no time.

Ben said...

The joys of television. Why don't we get your great reality shows Dale ? I think the BBC are slipping up.

gizmorox said...

I watched the first season of Canadian Idol back in the day, with cutie Ryan Malcolm. What brief snippets I heard of his first album were crap though. Shame.

And hey, at least Studio 60 has Perry playing a drug addled nutjob, so he doesn't have to stretch his acting chops too far.

Dale said...

Hmm, interesting question Old Lady. Is that like paying for cable Erik? Are you just doing a holdover on the pretentious used to live in the UK thing? :-)

I'd never seen Project Runway although I know Beth and several other people mention it quite a bit. I went to bed last night and was flicking channels when ta-da, there it was on the Life Channel. They were designing dresses and accompanying outfits for dogs. It was pretty funny. Ivanka was there looking disinterested but fascinating. So was Vera Wang, she's a looker! The short one got the cut. Always the way.

Chancelucky - we get a singer who never had a huge splash playing Paula and some Cdn producer / industry types - one who dresses like a pimped out Randy, an aging doofus as Simon and in an exciting twist, an extra judge to pretend to be the voice of wisdom but really to spar with the Simon character. So, I don't know who any of them are either. The prize is a pig. What you do with it...

The place is spotless X. Dell!

Oh Ben, if I could just get 24 hour BBC and porn, I'd be so happy!

I remember him but haven't heard any of the pap he released Giz. You're right, Matthew should do just fine.

Beth said...

I forgot about "Studio 60" and went out instead. Was it worth staying home for?

Next thing you kmnow, you'll be reporting about "Project Runway" every Thursday morning ...

Erik said...

Yep, totally doing the pretentious repatriated expat thing. But only to make the point that if you live in, oh, I dunno, say Pittsburgh, you absolutely *need* a TV & several hours a day exposure to survive (ever see "Videodrome"?), which is not true in the UK, which is full of interesting people doing interesting things. :-)

And maybe you could combine the 24 hour BBC & the porn channels & just have the one. What do you reckon? (Pretentious deployment of UK slang noted.)

Old Lady said...

Videodrome!!!!! Human flesh melding with machinery & electronics!!!! EEEEEEEEEEEck! It think it's cuz your power is so strange!

Also, I have been trying to convince people for years that we southerners speak English and not American-Erik you have just proved it,reckon?

Grant Miller said...

I prefer my Perries puffy.

Dale said...

Nothing's worth staying home for if you've got somewhere fun to be Beth. I will blog about anything so there's no telling what might happen next.

Just the one would be great I'd say Erik but how to break it up - 12 hours each or...? And thank you for clearing that all up. Videodrome?!

Videodrome?! Yes, that's what he said Old Lady. I remember that creepy film. I reckon you and Erik need to combine everything into just the one language.

My guess is sometimes you don't feel fresh Grant Miller.

Angela said...

Ben Mulroney speaks? I thought he was made of plastic? I am so confused right now...

Nice recap of all the shows I missed!

Dale said...

He's definitely part plastic. It's a string that you pull out the back of that shellac'd hair I think that gets him to talk.