8/12/2006

Nastassia Kinkajou

I heard on the radio earlier that Paris Hilton required a tetanus shot after suffering a superficial bite from her pet kinkajou. Could Paris have any other type of calamity than a superficial one?

At first I though kinkajou was a term of endearment she'd given Saviour Onassis after their recent meeting but I was relieved to learn that he wasn't implicated.

23 comments:

Beth said...

The most brilliant question I've read in weeks. Once again, viva la Canada!

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-Savanna

Melinda June said...

Saw this on thesuperficial. WTF? Who decides to have a house raccoon? Paris Hilton, I guess. What a moron.

What makes it manipulatory? Does it pout when it wants attention? Call me crazy...a tenacious, species-specifc bacteria in its saliva makes me think I'd be happier with a cat.

X. Dell said...

Yes, and where does Nastasia fit into all of this?

If the term were what you thought, you'd think that a kinkajou would be more of a compliment, since everyone would want one.

Old Lady said...

I had a boyfriend who had a kinkajou. He didn't look a thing like Saviour Onassiss.

blog Portland said...

I hope the monkey got a shot against whatever Paris is carrying.

Saviour Onassis said...

No one has ever called me a kinkjou to my face.

I'm smiling again. Thanks Dale...

: )

mellowlee said...

Goodness gracious! Nasty little kinkajou! Didn't she fall off a horse in the first episode of Simple Life...

Fence said...

And quoted

Ben said...

I heard she took a dump the other day and her record is out now.

justacoolcat said...

So Paris got a tetanus shot. Pretty risky considering it could have destroyed her. Throw some penicillin and she'd actually turn to dust. (Which Lohan would then "clean" up with her nose)

Dale said...

Don't thank me Beth, thank that brave little kinkajou.

Thanks Savanna. The missing ice cream flavour must be spaghetti and meatballs.

Hey crazy! I mean Melinda June, she's a bit of a maroon and a moron I'd say. I'm just sorry you've had to move away and you're still not rid of her.

Kinkajou, kinkyJew, Kinski, I dunno X. Dell, I'm more confused now than ever.

Who didn't Old Lady? The boyfriend or the kinkajou, ba-dup-bum. We should take this act on the road.

She's a carrier from way back B.Portland. Are you wearing night vision glasses so the rest of life looks like her sex tape?

Saviour Onassis, smiling. Well well well. That's a good thing. You effing kinkajou.

The kinkajou Lee? ba-dup-bum. Never mind, that was lame. I actually am happy to say I've never seen the show.

Fence! You're so cunning and lovely. Thanks.

Will you be reviewing Ben? Or will Will? Do it, you know you want to.

Bella Rossa said...

Yeah, it's not like anyone expects Paris Hilton to suffer a profound, substantial, and lasting injury.

chelene said...

Now she's got a kinkajou? Two weeks ago I saw pictures of her in an alley snuggling with a ferret! She's an animal whore.

mellowlee said...

Her falling off of the horse was on the news. I didn't, don't, won't watch her show either. I have a feeling it would suck what little brains I have out of my head.

Creepy said...

I'm still hoping for battery acid or some other caustic solution to her face. Something that forces her to wear a 'Phantom of the Opera' type mask. Please life, grant me this one wish before I die...

Dale said...

Busy Bella! How are you? You're right, she's really not a legacy kind of gal about anything except all that cash she's sitting on.

She's a whore and brings out the worst in all of us, and the animal kingdom. Chelene, we should be worshipping you. And your collection of tiny bottles and men. Sorry about that. I'm admonishing myself as I type.

She does suck pretty damned hard. We need you to keep what you got in there so ignore her Lee.

I'm surprised at you Creepy. Do you know how hard it would be to get a kinkajou to keep a Phantom mask on? Keep it real man.

Grant Miller said...

I'm sure Paris has several other more serious diseases.

Dale said...

First hand info Dr. Miller?

SlayGirl said...

Your comments are killing me Dale. I was having the crappiest day until I read them. As always the comments are as good as the post.

Dale said...

Glad you're enjoying SG, so am I.

Angela said...

I think if Paris were to bite someone else, he/she would require a rabies shot...

Dale said...

I wonder what would happen if she ran into one of her rabid / avid fans?